Fette Sau

Since my mediocre experience at Dinosaur Barbecue (festive atmosphere, meh food, unacceptable wait), I've stayed away from barbecue because....well, I like barbecue steak over a grill better. Fette Sau in Williamsburg is a dingy looking alley with a neon pink sign beckoning you into a garage. I've always been intrigued, but when I found they served barbecue, I said never mind. Time to suck it up and suck on some ribs when my friend Lauren had her birthday party there.



I wandered to the bar and ordered a cherry soda before the meat massacre and beer guzzling. (Actually I cannot guzzle too much beer. It's much more fun for others than it is for me.) And guess what! Real sugar, no high fructose corn syrup! Wow! Amazing! It doesn't take much to win me over little by little. Also, I learned that the meat was from small local farms and this restaurant buys the entire animal, so you know exactly where it comes from and more specifically, the animal you're eating. I didn't inquire about my ingested pig, but I'm sure you could. And a happy pig is a TASTY PIG. I was totally sold.



I'm sorry I ate all the meat that was put in front of me in such a hurry, that all I managed to take pictures of in my idle time was beer. Incidentally, you can order beer by the jar, half gallon or gallon. You order your meat by the pound. I loved the pulled pork, brisket and pork belly.

Sometimes when you eat a great meal, you are stuffed to the gills and feel a little sick. Other times, you know when you should stop, but have a hard time stopping. Your fingers say YES MORE and your stomach says YESSSSSS MORRRREEEE and your mouth is the happy middleman that gladly samples the goods but your brain has to put the brakes on it. Some people don't have any common sense and don't know when to stop.....sadly, that night, I did.

The other sweet Jesus

Speaking of sweet Jesuses, I went to Marlow and Sons with my favourite wayward Muslim. I'm not sure what I had for dinner, but I definitely knew what we had to start. They're supposed to be famous for their brick chicken, but I don't remember having that and the only thing that could make me give up a house speciality is a special fish of the day or lamb chop, so that's probably what I had. The bartender made me a tarragon mojito and we ordered a CHEESE PLATE while inquiring about salami.

She rattled off a couple of names and then our ears prickled when she said 'The Baby Jesus'.

"WE'LL HAVE SOME OF THAT"

There is something deliciously sacrilegious about eating a salami called The Baby Jesus with a wayward Muslim, as a moderately well behaved jack russell terrier about half a foot away from us looks longingly at our meat plate before lunging at his owner's salad, and finally washing down our entire meaty meal with an espresso...with milk.

I love Bonus

I love this pig! More than you can ever imagine! It has lazy eye! (it gets more obvious when you see it BIG in the stores, and I think it is amazing because the eyes are even more unequal in real life. I badly want to meet the designer who made this pig.) This is the cheap grocery store that was around the corner from the apartment. The pig is happy because you're saving money and I suppose you're also giving them money too, much like a Walmart low cost business model, but with a BENIGN LOOKING LAZY EYE PIG!!!!!! I am a sucker for cute and ridiculous animals.

(Aside) Feast your eyes on this ridiculousness! Moo-maid of Zennor ice cream in Cornwall. No one can resist a moo-maid. INDEED THEY CANNOT:



So at Bonus, there were isles and isles of house brand produce. Wonky pigs on everything! On meat! On Bread! All over! I was overcome with joy. Sometimes when the printing was a little off, especially on more delicate (cheap) packaging, the wonky eye discrepancy was even more apparent. I bought some Bonus bread to make sandwiches with because it was the cheapest, and was pleasantly surprised to find that the bread was laden with seeds and was really very tasty.

I also bought a carton of eggs that I stupidly didn't take a picture of (it had a picture of an enthusiastic chicken's head on it), and made the CREAMIEST scrambled eggs I have ever had. They were so buttery smooth even though I didn't put any butter in them.

Also in my grocery haul was some ham and bacon cream cheese (very creamy. very hammy.) Different types of yogurt, skyr, ham, some blue lagoon colored ice cream bars and a bag of coffee (for emergency brewing). Check out these pork products:



Yessssss, scientific diagrams to compel you to eat more ham, bacon and salami in perfect proportions. Most excellent. (Thanks Roboppy for pointing this out! I would have totally missed this even though I had two packets of of it in the fridge.)

I am sad that I was only in Iceland for a whirlwind 4 1/2 days, and would loved to have explored all the bounty that Bonus had to offer, starting with the assortment of very curious milk (I didn't understand a word of what was on the milk cartons, so I picked the ones with dancing blue and purple stick figure children on the box and figured if it must be safe for doodling children, it must be safe for me).