Ode to the Artichoke

By Pablo Neruda

The artichoke
With a tender heart
Dressed up like a warrior,
Standing at attention, it built
A small helmet
Under its scales
It remained
Unshakeable,
By its side
The crazy vegetables
Uncurled
Their tendrills and leaf-crowns,
Throbbing bulbs,
In the sub-soil
The carrot
With its red mustaches
Was sleeping,
The grapevine
Hung out to dry its branches
Through which the wine will rise,
The cabbage
Dedicated itself
To trying on skirts,
The oregano
To perfuming the world,
And the sweet
Artichoke
There in the garden,
Dressed like a warrior,
Burnished
Like a proud
Pomegrante.
And one day
Side by side
In big wicker baskets
Walking through the market
To realize their dream
The artichoke army
In formation.
Never was it so military
Like on parade.
The men
In their white shirts
Among the vegetables
Were
The Marshals
Of the artichokes
Lines in close order
Command voices,
And the bang
Of a falling box.

But
Then
Maria
Comes
With her basket
She chooses
An artichoke,
She's not afraid of it.
She examines it, she observes it
Up against the light like it was an egg,
She buys it,
She mixes it up
In her handbag
With a pair of shoes
With a cabbage head and a
Bottle
Of vinegar
Until
She enters the kitchen
And submerges it in a pot.

Thus ends
In peace
This career
Of the armed vegetable
Which is called an artichoke,
Then
Scale by scale,
We strip off
The delicacy
And eat
The peaceful mush
Of its green heart.


Sent to me by a friend today.

Marmite Love

I have always had an insane craving for all things salty, spicy, and sour (someday I will tell you about my pickle fetish, or my S&M relationship with kim chi, or how many extra hot pepperettes I am embarassed to consume in a day). Other people love cupcakes, I love all things strange and savoury.

(I recently named the groundhog who lives on our property Polskie Ogorki, and I think if I ever got into meditation, UMAMI would be my chant word. UMAAAAMI UMAAAAMI.)

This morning, I made my idea of heaven on a plate: my new favourite breakfast is an open-faced toasted sesame bagel with a runny overeasy egg on either face, both bagel and egg slathered with MARMITE (a present from my sister who currently lives in the land of Marmite-lovers). A slight touch of sweet under the egg was the secret ingredient - a few very small dabs of President's Choice Spicy Szechuan Peanut Sauce rounds out the flavour and gives it a heavenly oomph.

Ooo, yeah. MArMIte, baby.

random gourmet: Shrimp, Olive and Fennel Orzo

My absolute favourite thing in the world as a cook is when a meal gets spontaneously invented with nothing but the random things in my fridge and my own creativity. There is nothing more satisfying.

Last night, I made this:

Shrimp, Olive and Fennel Orzo
served 2

Ingredients:

2 big handfuls of frozen shrimp
leftover orzo from last night's ratatouille
1/2 leftover fennel bulb
a big handful of canned black olives
leftover brine from marinated artichokes (i.e. oil and vinegar dressing)
1 lemon
1/3 lime (would have added more lime but that's what was in my fridge)
garlic
salt
fresh ground pepper

Directions:
1. Cover frozen shrimp with water in a pot and bring to boil. By the time it boils, the shrimp is probably defrosted and cooked.
2. Break up leftover orzo and season with artichoke dressing (or any other oil and vinegar).
3. Roughly dice up the black olives and garlic (as much as you like).
4. Slice the fennel as thinly as you can.
5. Cool the cooked shrimp and peel shells off.
6. Toss the shrimp in a hot wok or pan with chunky bashed black peppercorns, salt and oil till hot. If you have cumin, I think that would taste nice (I was a bit sore that we were out).
7. Throw in olives and garlic and toss for 30 sec or so.
8. Throw in fennel and toss for 30 sec (doesn't need much if you've sliced it thin).
9. Throw in the orzo and toss for another minute or so (just for warming).
10. Transfer to serving bowl and dress with citrus juice and a splash of olive oil. Serve with reserved fennel tops (I forgot to use them with last night's ratatouille).

Adapt as desired or necessary.

Beautiful.

(P.S. Sorry, no pics. Sometimes spontaneity doesn't allow for that.)

Tasty Cephalopods

I wanted to pay tribute to my all time favourite food blog: Deep End Dining, by showing you two posts that changed the way I look at food forever (for good or bad).

Eddie Lin, you are one deliciously sick man.

The first is imprinted forever in the cookbook of my brain as a piece of blog writing perfection. A lasting classic. In this piece, Eddie invents the peanut butter and jellyfish sandwich as a demonstration of environmental activism (with the rise in sea temperatures, jellyfish have begun to choke out all other underwater life):

Peanut Butter and Jellyfish



The video where he feeds the pb and jf sandwich to his unsuspecting wife is gold. You gotta love her for liking the stuff. She is adorable.

pb & jellyfish sandwich from eric alba on Vimeo.

Then there's the time Eddie eats live octopus tentacles. This was my first radical encounter with live food. It blew my mind. Since then I have discovered that people eat all kinds of things live: snake, lobster, whole octopus... all still wriggling. I don't know if I could do it.

Rude food. Live Octopus Tentacles.

Live Tentacles (High Res) from eric alba on Vimeo.

Would you? Have you?

bacon vodka

I am drawn to this recipe like a car accident. Would you try it if I made it?

via Brownie Points